- Boy meets girl. Talks to her. They fall in love. They are from different communities. Boy's family has no objection to love marriages as long as the groom is not their son. Girl's family has no objection to inter-community marriages as long as their daughter isn't the bridegroom. They still love each other, are independent individuals with egalitarian thoughts.
- Boy talks to a girl on phone. Finds that they share similar ideals. He hasn't met her even once the but ends up falling in love with her because he ended up sharing more about himself with her than with anybody else. They finally part ways because though with similar ideals, their expectations from life are way too different.
- Boy likes girl. Girl likes boy. But their liking for their dreams and ambitions is probably stronger than their liking for each other, despite their families liking each other too. So they don't express this mutual liking and single-mindedly pursue their ambitions- leaving things at the mercy of time.
- Boy and girl love each other. Girl's family creates trouble. They try to prolong things as far as possible, so that they are independent by the time a marriage is on the cards. Girl's family continues creating trouble persistenly. They end up eloping to get married.
For two responsible people who love and respect each other, and accept each other as distinctly different individuals, eloping is definitely the most abhorred and quite obviously the last option. They would prefer trying all other options that make their families love each other and each others' families as well before they resort to the last option.
India is an independent country for the last 62 years. It's high time its citizens become free-thinking individuals- because such meaningless barriers that our mind creates in the name of caste, status or religion only ends up impeding ourselves. The old should give way to the new. The new should respect the old- for the simple reason that it would not have been new had not the old chosen to be called so. And at the same time, the old should also respect the new. This mutual respect is the foundation of any progressive society.
The youth is not here to accept things in stagnation.
They are here to be the change they believe in. And this is not a hollow election one liner for them!
Well... Sounds like am reading a wanna be rebellion..anyway i partly agree with your theory..Its true that the youth is educated and mature enough to take the big decisions of life like marriage but without the support and the guide of elders often things go wrong.. no wonder we see so many relationships going Kaput now a days.. My point is let the gen-x decide its own path but it should be merged with the experience of the older generation... Its only when things go hand in hand then we would see the desired result..secondly I would like to throw light upon the caste and religion bridge..Its something that has been a major hindrance in India's development since a long time.. Now we cannot take it anymore.. We have to rise above it if we wish to see India Shining.. And Please mark my words.. love, Peace, Unity, Compassion, Honesty are the only attributes required to build a strong nation!!!! Nothing else...
ReplyDeleteLove- Ramish
Hey Shreya.
ReplyDeleteLiked your post a lot. Too true. I agree with you on every point except the eloping part. Look, today's parents are not like they will lock you in room or compel you to marry somebody THEY love(better say today's youth are way too self-dependent to do so!), rather they will give you their consent with that ever-so dry attitude saying, "Your wish, your life, but that isn't making us happy". And the problem starts right there. Convincing your parents is a harculean task. I would like to know your take on this issue.
Cheers!
Most parents normally leave it on their children's wish, but many people are still too conservative,even if they come from well off backgrounds-they still have been unable to discard that small town mentality on inter community marriages.Eloping can never be justified-but peep into the ultra conservative small town families, and you will easily get to see parents who don't even think twice before harassing their own children for this issue-it all sounds like a typical Bollywood drama of the yore, but such cases do exist,though sporadically!In such cases,eloping is the only option left!You actually have to see it to believe it.
ReplyDeleteIn all other cases, I very strongly feel people in love should be strong enough to convince their families or else its their failure.They say nothing is impossible in love and war-so why should convincing parents seem so impossible?
By the way,Sweet,thanks for your comment.But I would like to know whether I know you.If you don't mind,plz introduce yourself.
Well, you dont know me, while searching 'bengali' through blogger, I ended up to your blog. Liked your post so commented. For more intro, mail me. ;)
ReplyDeleteHmm, to the small town thing, Being a small town girl,I understand completly. Though I am lucky enough to have broad minded parents, but still, people are a bit skeptical when it comes to inter-REGION/community/caste/whatever marriages. You seem to be a chetan bhagat fan, so like he says, from biscuits to brides, parents want their views to be considered in everything! Anyways. Nice reading ya.
Cheers!